VOID THOUGHTS

I cannot remember the last time I ate a pear, or if I've ever had one at all.              I am perplexed by terracotta on a monthly basis              Is love real?              I think I could urinate into an upstairs window from the ground outside if I maintained a full erection and fuller bladder              Bits in your orange juice? I'm in favour but I know not everyone is.              I think splitting the moon in half and putting each side on opposite sides of Earth would be of great benefit              Are Turks really so delightful?                         
void

All my life is taking a shit or waiting to shit again

I don't think there is much more to life than this. The human condition is one of toil, pain and disposal. My very existence is fueled by the need to take one matter and convert it into shit. I literally leave the world a shittier place. What a burden to put on a young man, to tell him such a thing at such a young age and, perhaps worse, to have created me with that curse. I'll never forgive them for what they did.

The Facts:

  • Everytime I take a shit it comes out like a spicy aerosol
  • I have no conscious memory of shitting myself, at most I've touched cloth on a few occasions
  • Sometimes I spend as much as 45 minutes on the toilet in a single session and nothing comes out
My Thoughts
It’s not arson if you don’t start it.
|
It must have been a hot summer around 2008, but I was hanging out with some kids when I saw a thin wisp of smoke tickling the sky, dancing and weaving in the haze of a heat only produced by…